Once upon a time there was an inquisitive girl who simply couldn’t mind her own business. Her mother tried to send her on errands so that she could get her out of the way. What luck that she had just the job for this little miss. “Go and visit your sick grandmamma this afternoon. She will be so happy to see you” said the mother. So Red Riding Hood, for that was her name, wore her red cape and set out. “Stay on the path” cautioned her mother. Miss Red smiled condescendingly for mothers would be mothers.
She took the prepared basket of fruits, cakes, currants and potted meat and quickly took the detour into the forest. The woods were lovely, dark and deep and all that but what mattered most was that she saw a wolf, which looked like he could do with some feeding up. The wolf was a gossipy soul and was thrilled to see this talkative Miss Red. He had tried for some porky meal only last week but the three little pigs were too smart for him. They did not let him in though he threatened them so. But he was not so foolish to jump into some pot of boiling water as some were wont to believe. Miss Red came up to him and said,” You could do with some fattening up. Come with me to my grand mamma’s and share this basket of good food. The wolf’s eyes glazed with the wonderful aroma and he rubbed his hands in glee. “You go on ahead and I will join you” he said. Miss Red went on and spent some time talking with Miss Muffet, her friend. Why she sat on a tuffet was beyond comprehension and why she was content to eat just curds and whey, was mindboggling. But the frightened Miss Muffet had since recovered from the spider episode and was happy that it was Miss Red who came along and not another spider. Anyway, she did not want company and avoided Miss Nosy Parker. Miss Red jumped this way and that until she reached her old relative’s haunt. She thought better of knocking on the door and decided to surprise the old thing. She took the back door which she knew had a loose catch and entered the house. The wolf who had reached much earlier and had gulped grandma, was now rolling on the bed with a tummy ache. “What are grandmas made up of anyway? “ he thought. Miss Red looked at the wolf’s disguise all askew and did not have to wonder about the big eyes, big nose and big teeth. “A cheap trick” was her opinion. Grandma was knocking valiantly from inside and it was up to Miss Red to do the right thing and liberate her. Skipping aside all the gory details, grandma came out looking as fresh as a daisy but said that the cramped quarters of the last half hour gave her an appetite. The wolf thanked Miss Red of curing him of the stomach ache and sat quietly in the corner waiting for his turn. The wood cutter, who had a crush on grandma, came by uninvited and they all had a happy meal. The wolf slinked away to go beg Miss Muffet for some curds and whey. He would become a vegetarian at this rate. But this was his lucky day. When he saw the bear family locking their cabin and going for a walk, he decided to wait until they turned round the corner. But before he could move a muscle, another inquisitive brat jumped into the cabin through the window. She had yellow golden hair. If this was Goldilocks, he would jump into that pot of boiling water waiting for him. He saw her go from room to room, trying out chairs and beds for size. What is this, a furniture show room, he wondered. Then she did the most shameless thing. Even in this hungry state, he would not have done this. He was brought up well. The yellow hair girl tasted all the gooey porridge on the breakfast table and then sat down to eat it all up. She went and bounced up and down after that. When the bears came back from their walk, they saw her asleep on the baby cot. The wolf called papa bear out and gave him the low down on Goldilocks. Then mama bear took pity on the girl and shooed her away. Goldilocks met Miss Red and then they decided to go find Miss Muffet. The three gossipy friends had enough of stories to share. The polite wolf got some titbits and had to wait for another day and another story. Miss Red came back with an empty basket home and when her mother asked her how grandma was, Miss Red said that grandma was getting delusional in her old age and talked of wolfs at the doorstep. But there would be a wedding to arrange soon as Peter the woodcutter had decided to do the decent thing and marry grandma. “So we could all live happily ever after”, I suppose, said mother, shaking her head in despair.
